A Wren Says

I wore a pair of designer shades today. Trust me, I had no intention of making such a purchase for myself. Obvious branding is something I shy away from. Instead, this was meant to be a gift for someone who loved obvious branding and flashy things. But after a series of events, I was unable to deliver the gift. Unfortunately with the passing of time, I wasn’t able to make a return either. Then there I was with a pair sunglasses I never really wanted. I guess I should wear them.

They looked good. The polarized lenses made things so clear. They are the obvious choice for driving and sitting out on a sunny day. This pair was a far cry from those I’ve ever bought for myself. Because after all, what would people say? Would they not think they were too ostentations? I mean these things are gaudy, right? Will they think I’m shallow. I took a deep breath, pulled together an outfit for brunch, and packed the glasses.

As we stood outside, continuing to talk after our meal, I put on the glasses to shield my eyes from the sun. The self-consciousness began to kick in as I remembered how big the logos were on the frames. I was waiting for someone to say something and readied myself for an answer, but no one said a thing. It was if they didn’t care at all.

I had been depriving myself of wearing a quality pair of sunglasses just for fear of attention turning toward me. I sacrificed my own good to avoid the momentary discomfort of someone disagreeing with my choice. But then again, instead of choosing momentary discomfort I chose the long-term anxiety that comes with being preoccupied with other people’s thinking, which I can tell you is much more uncomfortable.

Is the only reason that you are (not) doing x just because you’re afraid someone will think y? That’s the question I have for myself moving forward. Once I plug in the different variables, if the answer is, “yes,” then I have to shake myself and go on my own path. Even if it is a little scary, because I can’t really control what people think or how they will react. I can however choose the lenses I choose to see the world through, and I’m glad this pair of designer shades got me to see this clearly.